{"id":260,"date":"2016-05-06T01:10:25","date_gmt":"2016-05-06T01:10:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/?p=260"},"modified":"2017-04-22T22:41:55","modified_gmt":"2017-04-22T22:41:55","slug":"mothers-day-for-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/?p=260","title":{"rendered":"Mother’s Day for Me"},"content":{"rendered":"

I wrote this last year on Mother’s Day. For those of you who don’t know my story: in 2012 my daughter passed away at 2 months old from a genetic disease for which there is currently no treatment or cure.<\/p>\n

I never got to celebrate a Mother’s Day. She was out of my reach by the time May rolled around. For that reason, the day on which we celebrate motherhood is always a little painful. I celebrate the women in my life who are mothers – but mourn my own loss.<\/p>\n

Last year, I vowed that I would not wallow. The universe disagreed. \u00a0Here’s what I wrote:<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Today’s mantra:<\/p>\n

don’t hermit.<\/p>\n

No sitting in the dark<\/p>\n

alone in the chair<\/p>\n

where I held her when she passed.<\/p>\n

The chair is gone.<\/p>\n

A party is planned.<\/p>\n

I force\u00a0myself to move on,<\/p>\n

to keep living.<\/p>\n

But I have to wonder<\/p>\n

If I’m not supposed to sit<\/p>\n

at home\u00a0alone\u00a0in the dark\u00a0mourning,<\/p>\n

then why is it raining?\u00a0\"Water<\/p>\n

This year, my plan is to get the wallowing out of the way before Sunday, so maybe I can join in celebrating those women who I love and admire. Maybe it will be better, maybe not. I’m sure one day, after years of practice, I’ll get this thing right.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wrote this last year on Mother’s Day. For those of you who don’t know my story: in 2012 my daughter passed away at 2 months old from a genetic disease for which there is currently no treatment or cure. I never got to celebrate a Mother’s Day. She was out of my reach by […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":261,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-260","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-about-robin","category-words"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/260","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=260"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/260\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":266,"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/260\/revisions\/266"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/261"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=260"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=260"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lonelycloudphotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=260"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}